Somehow when I was younger I had an idea of how my life would pan out. I thought it would all turn out OK and pretty much as expected. Today has been one of those days when I realise that life isn’t like that. It bears no resemblance to the picture I had in my head, and in fact it is almost the exact opposite. Instead I have to watch my sister fulfilling that dream.
I have lots of good things in my life but today all I feel is loss. Loss for the dreams I had when I was young and loss for a relationship with a God who I believe actually gives a shit about what happens in my life. Loss.
So instead, I consoled myself with good friends, wine and tennis. That’ll have to do for today.