2012 Project365 (Day 91)

Moaning MothersNow, before I start, I know this isn’t going to be an popular post but it is relevant to where I am at the moment! I should also so that this isn’t aimed at all the Mum’s I know. Some of them are brilliant and some of them really realise how lucky they are.

I read this article in the Family (how ironic!) section of The Guardian today and this woman could have been writing about my own life. Basically she is saying that she is fed-up with hearing women moaning about being mothers and all the problems that come with it, when she is unable to have children. She asserts that to be able to moan about being a Mum is luxury she doesn’t have and therefore it upsets her to hear it.

Now, whether you agree with her or not, her viewpoint is valid and I definitely understand it. To hear friends and acquaintances bitching about being tired, bored of being stuck at home, fed up of clearing up sick etc etc is actually tough for me. I would give anything to be in that position, but sadly I am not. To hear someone moaning about the things you most want is tough.

The article writer says….

“I don’t want to mum-bash, but I do want mums to open their eyes and see what they have. At the risk of being lynched – or, worse, incurring the wrath of Mumsnet Towers … give it a break. Give me a break. Give women like me, who wanted children but don’t have them, a break. You mums do not know how blessed you are – so please just be happy and quit complaining. You got the prize. You have the child. Rejoice.

Of course being a mum has its difficulties – but they are finite and surmountable. If you haven’t had a child, that devastating problem can never be solved. So raising a child is expensive? So is being single and living alone. You are tired and shattered? That must be horrible – but that feeling can be short-term and the pros (snuggling up to your warm, chubby baby) surely outweigh that particular con? (And let me tell you, the emotional upset of crying congratulations down the phone when your sister nervously tells you she is pregnant, just days after you’ve been told you most probably never will be, can be exhausting too.)”

To read the full article click here.

To the writer. Thank you for writing what will undoubtedly be an unpopular article and thank-you for saying all the things that I am unable to say myself.

One thought on “2012 Project365 (Day 91)

  1. Thanks for sharing this. I can’t begin to imagine how hard this is for you. The older I get the more likely it is that I won’t have children, and most of the time I’m fine about this. But I really struggle with mum’s who moan about how tough it is being a mum, and begrudge me the good things I get for being single, but without being willing to see (let alone share) the good things they get by being mums. The world we live in seems to think being a mum gives you special rights, which just makes it tougher for those of us who aren’t mums.

Comments are closed.