Tag Archives: Barnabas

2012 Project365 (Day 78)

Mother's DayMothering Sunday is one of those days that brings massive mixed emotions for me.

I love my Mum so much and she has been the amazing support to me over the years. I am very grateful to her for all the she does for me and all that she is to me. Without her I would be so much poorer (not just financially!) and it is so nice to be living with her again!

However, Mothering Sunday also makes me feel really sad. I thought I would be a Mum by now and yet it hasn’t happened. Mother’s Day just serves to remind me of the fact that I feel like a failure and I am devastated that I am not a Mum, and don’t know whether I will ever manage to become a Mum. I decided not to go to church today because I just couldn’t face it. Too many reminders of the things I don’t have. Sometimes it is just too painful.

Today’s picture is of my Mum and me nephew Barnabas. They are reading the book that he gave to Mum as a Mother’s Day present. I hope, more than anything, that one day she will be a Grandma to my children too.

Oh, and a massive hello to my mother-in-law Beryl (I know she reads my blog!). We miss you and love you too! Happy Mother’s Day.

2012 Project365 (Day 59)

It's my house!The Mister and I bought Eden this Wendy House for her birthday yesterday. I have to admit that it was a massive bargain and was in a blue cross sale reduced from £80 to £20. It does have one set of shutter missing but I figured that it wouldn’t make too much of a difference. I do love a bargain!

I tried desperately to get a decent photo of both of the children but Eden was getting tired and hungry and was therefore grouchy. So, this photo made me laugh instead. It looks as though she is having a hissy fit because Barnabas is playing with her toy. I have to admit that Eden does do a tantrum well! It reminds me of a brilliant photo of me and my sister taken when I was about 5 and she was three. I am sitting on the swing smirking and she is standing looking really, really grumpy.

2012 Project365 (Day 20)

Day 20 - 20 Jan 2012Every Friday my Mum looks after my nephew Barnabas and my niece Eden.

Every Friday Barnabas sits down with my dad, his Grandpa and a huge bowl of cereal and he proceeds to have his second breakfast of the day. We have graduated from him simply picking all the sultanas out of the cereal, to having a spoon of his own and helping himself.

It always makes me laugh, and I think this is Grandpa’s special time with Barnabas



Well our lovely nephew Barnabas is one year old today. He is so gorgeous and a real little pickle and I miss him loads.

The pain of not having children certainly hasn’t receded with him coming along, in fact in many ways it has made that pain more intense and more pronounced as I can see just what I am missing out on. Not knowing if we will ever get that experience is pretty hard to deal with. However, I certainly wouldn’t miss out on having Barnabas around. he is a complete joy and great fun and I can’t wait to see him again!!

We bought Barnabas a big present but I couldn’t resist making him something (boys are so hard to make for!) so I made him some little aprons which I thought he might be able to use when he is painting or colouring or cooking with Granny. Here’s a pic!